Loss of autonomy - 2023 12 14

 


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Invisible no more

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Mom is learning to use her iPad to have face to face conversations with her children. "I love to hear my children's voices". She is always calm after she spends time with one of her kids. Invisible no more. I am not angry at my Mom. She is aging and losing ground with each passing day. She is aging as gracefully and with as much good humour as she can muster. She works hard to maintain her independence, even as her strength declines, and she copes with more aches and pains. I admire my Mom and I am happy to take care of her. The fact is, though, that I don't have much choice. My Mom is utterly frail and vulnerable. If she was left in the care of an institution, she would not be able to defend herself, or activate necessary services on her own behalf. She would be a dependent of that institution, its policies, its governance, and the ethical and moral values that guide the employees that are paid to provide services to my Mom. My beloved Mother-In-Law was diagnosed wit...
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Problems Facing Caregivers

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At present there is no quantified data demonstrating the work being carried out in family caregiving homes. We see the impacts of this work in caregiver burnout and emergency hospital admissions. We see the policies that contribute to caregiving crisis when patients are sent home through early discharge, hospital to home, and aging in place without adequate supports for caregivers accounted in the planning. "To properly support caregivers and care providers, public policy needs to consider caregivers and care providers as relevant partners in health and social services. This will require more than just a shift in perspective; it will require bold public policy solutions to address the problems facing caregivers and care providers."  https://canadiancaregiving.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/11/CCCE_Giving-Care.pdf We aren't going to be able to shift perspectives without quantified data from family caregiving homes. We need to show the impact of caregiving provided by families...
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Disappearing Acts - 2023 09 05

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Family caregivers perform their work in a void of substantial system support. They guard their care recipients with everything they have, even as their own lives suffer from the expenditure of effort. It is time to process the time and finance numbers from August. We have held steady this month despite the absence of family members on vacations. I continue to learn what I can manage, what I can survive, and what I can transcend. This is work that rarely lasts longer than 24 hours and can disappear  within 5 minutes. For example, yesterday I loaded the dishwasher and got it started, wiped down the counters and emptied the compost. Mom was sitting in her chair watching the tidy up. Once I was done, I asked Mom, "How about a cup of tea?" "Oh, yes!" she replied enthusiastically, "That would be wonderful."  I put the kettle on to boil, pull out a clean mug from the cupboard, load it with a tea bag, sugar and milk. I checked the clock and realized it was already...
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